Sometimes you see magic, sometimes talent. I’m not quite sure which one this is but this guy can throw about his balls like no one else. Balls of Fury..yes that movie sucked, but this clip is awesome… i wish I had hidden skills, well maybe I do and I don’t know about em yet.
Enjoy!
Go Billy!
Poor democrats all over the country are looking for rocks to hide under. But I digress; the whole country should be ashamed of no one else but themselves. Since when it became OK to watch public mud slinging, as potential presidents square off? Well since, that’s what sold the newspapers. People stopped reading, and/or perhaps understanding, when the past candidates were discussing policies and changes that mattered, and gaped their mouths open and clapped when candidates started talking smack about each other.
And this is what you get. Couple good months of Hillary Rodham Clinton bashing Barack Hussein Obama, Jr. aka Whopper Jr. or Bacon Jr. and Mr Bacon Jr. doing the same to Chelsea’s mom. It looked like each one of them really hated the other, and though the other one was the worst scum walking on this earth… or so they wanted the public to believe. Meanwhile Big Mac John McCain had a whole room’s attention to himself, and he did what any politician would do, stand up comedy! Thus was the choice, either between one of the clowns or stand up comedian, and trust me Jerry Seinfeld he isn’t… more like Michael Richards and his routine.
So Ram Rod Clinton is out of the race, perhaps she didn’t want to dig deeper into the Clinton fortune to whip out another shinny penny, or perhaps she realized that everyone is just pointing and laughing. What surprises me the most is that Hill and Whopper Jr. are such great friends now. Heck, now they will hold hands together and will try to take the White House by storm.
If someone wrote a comedy movie, and that was a plot it would be the crappiest movie ever. So bluntly fake, who would watch that crap? However people are still glued on to their TVs watching the news. Give it a rest people, SpongeBob marathon is on Nick all night… then at least you will know what you are laughing about.
On the good note, who ever wins now, it still will be an improvement… I hope.
I just love Mike Tyson, not only is he an awesome Boxer, but he is dumb and rich. I’m not talking Paris Hilton dumb, but he is naturally not brilliant, and there is no acting in it.
Without further adieu:
I admit it, I have secretly opened comments on for the last post just to do a little test. And guess what? SPAM. I wonder who spams my blog and why they would dedicate so much time… 12 pages of silly spam in 4 days time… gosh I hope they are the automated blogs and not some poor 3rd world country child typing all that crap out.
Regardless, to my joy and to your joy, the comments are open. I have found couple tools or plugins for wordpress that should curb the hooligan activity. If for some add reason your comments are not posting, please let me know and I will fixy fix it up, just for you.
Also you may have noticed, but the URL for each post has changed. Hopefully that will not result in any troubles either.
Be good, and I would love to hear from you,
Chimbles
While some of us are concentrated on whining how McDonald’s food is repulsive, on the other side of the world people are starving. Well correction… according to hmm Salvation Army there are millions of starving here at home in the U.S. Sure we do kind things for them during, like listening to local Food Share babble ads on the radio during Thanksgiving period. “We are only 1000 turkeys away from our goal!” I do wonder how that works, do Food Share people (who obviously need to knock off court appointed community hours) drive around to trailer park and randomly knock on doors handing out turkeys? I also wonder how many of those poor chaps got shot delivering the bird?However, people around the world are more crafy, while you whine about the fact that hot dogs are probably made from pig ears here what others are doing to eat:
Road Kill Combo #5 - As people get hungrier and hungrier they think of new and creative ways to turn garbage into food. I do give them props into making it look semi delicious. I know the food is nasty but still can’t help from having my tommy rumble when I look at the picture. I wonder what that stuff on the left is… looks like little pretzels… I bet they are delicious.
Receipe:
1) Find road kill, or a relative that has not been moving for at least five days
2) Find a big pot to house all your new found treasures
3) Add water, acid rain water will be optimal… BAM YOU GOTTA KICK IT UP A NOTCH
4) Do not add any salt or spices, this thing got the flavor already locked in it
5) Cook for 15 minutes to mix all the nutrients
6) Consume - Makes a meal for 3 fatsos or feeds 2 starving villages in Africa for 8 months, if serving to guests put alike items together… eyes with eyes, ears with ears and ad a cauliflower for a visual
Insect Bites - I’m not talking about that time a mosquito bit you giving you the Nile Virus and chlamydia, I’m talking about some delicious snacks with only 20 calories per quarter of cookie! Now to the point… Do you hate when the cookies you buy lose their crunchiness? I mean the packaging boldly states that they are the crunchy types, but five minutes from opening the damn box the cookies go soft, and taste like a cow pie on a hot and humid summer day… cementing your mouth wide open. Well, not these cookies, these cookies stay crunchy forever. Forever? Forever ever! And they are easy to make, with simple ingredients found in the Back to School section of your favorite corner store.
1) Ingridients: Cookies from the store (preferably the crunchy type), Elmer’s Glue “Extra Toxic”, and unwashed window or tool shed.
2) Collect the crunchy insects quite possibly found on the sill of every window in your house, behind the rear window in your dad’s el-camino, the floor of the tool shed also house a lot of deliciousness.
3) Glue the new found treasures using Elmer’s “Extra Toxic” to the cookies… make sure to lick your fingers clean afterwards. Spit gluing, even though cost effective, will only work for up to five minutes.
4) Leave the hybrid modified cookies on the table, and resist temptation, pass out during Halloween. Trick or treat My ASS!!
On the go snack - Are you constantly in motion, quite possibly traveling from in front of your computer to the fridge, then the bathroom to be back at your computer? Well let me teach you what they teach people in fancy business schools. First you need to optimize and streamline your routines (and diversify your portfolio, but thats for later!) Second you need to learn how to multi-task. Multitasking is the new buzzword in the business circles, it means doing couple things at the same time! And it looks great on your resume too. So taking everything we learned today and putting it together, you do the following things: Computer -> Fridge -> Crapper. To optimize it, we would eliminate one of the things, like going to the fridge. To multitask we need you to eat while you crap. This will result in giving you more time to spend on AOL, and quite possibly more time to be hooking up with hot mommies in the chatrooms. IMPOSSIBLE! - you say. Well, it was impossible until recently when On the Go Snack was invented. The best part is that stuff costs basically next to nothing!
1 ) Find some pig stomachs, horse stomachs, cat stomachs (for the pocket sized snack on the go snack), if none to be located you can use a shopping bag.
2) Rummage through garbage behind a chain restaurant to find any kind of foods: M&Ms, apple peals, old bologna, dog food
3) Stuff the stomachs with all the goodies found in the garbage can.
4) Check the oven if it works by turning it on on high and putting your head in it for couple minutes… if you get sleepy thats OK
5) Throw all that stuff into the oven, and cook until the fire alarm goes of
6) Tie the resulting food sacks into your belt loop, and go do your thing
Beef Simpleton - Named for the fact that its easy to make, so don’t get offended! If on the go snack, takes too long for you to make (because you are important businessman) and Road Kill Combo #5 sounds delicious, but you don’t want that much food… the simple solution is simpleton beef. Simpleton is based on road kill too, which offers the benefit of being literally free… heck someone may even thank you for picking up garbage on the road. So grab that opossum, or squirrel and bring it home. You will be benefiting the society, and yourself as well. It also wouldn’t hurt to walk down to City Hall and find out if you are eligible for some kind of tax break for picking up and consuming garbage. If they look at you weaird demand to talk to the Mayor, people on the bottom never have their facts straights, so go straight to the top.
Anyways heres how you prepare this tasty and very safe snack:
1) Find road kill of preferable size for the meal, if it’s too big don’t be a pig, someone else may have a whole family to feed!
2) Throw the roadkill in the chain and spokes area of your moped until everything is chopped up into little pieces.
3) Collect little pieces, and put them on the plate… say grace and consume.
“Wait what about cooking?” Well buddy, you don’t cook that baby… thats the beauty and simplicity of it! Enjoy!
Well I just got hungry writing all this stuff for you… so I guess I will go and snack up on something… I yet have to master the multitasking part of life. Bong Aperitif (thats French for hmm “Super Size please” I think… trust the French they know what they are doing, they have been eating frogs for ages!)
Did you enjoy this culinary escapade? Sure you did. Now while you can’t move from all the deliciousness you just consumed, check out these funny license plates!
Be it in school, at the community pool, in the bushes or at the mall; stupidity is everywhere. Seems like as we progress with this civilization we encounter more and more dumb people. Fudge, it even became a new fad to be dumb. Shows like Jerry Springer or Povich are growing in popularity as toothless people vie to be on the tube. I wouldn’t really blame them, it’s like 98% is not even known to exist so if you have the balls to expose that your grandpa is a grandma and also your lover for that five minutes of popularity, then go for it, leave your mark on the world… even if it’s a skid mark.
If you imagine going back to the day, you would picture a rich person that would probably be intelligent and witty, even if born into money such a person would attend the finest crowds and basically be fancy by osmosis, no matter how dumb they started at. However social pressures now a days, are to be lazy, say stupid shit, and do stupid shit, no matter how un common sense they are… actually the more you go against common sense now, the more “cool” you will be. Wear sandals in a winter storm, and you would be the epitome of “coolness.” Well going back to the rich, now we have rich people acting dumb, hey they even lead in categories of dumb shit said or done, and of course the average trailer trash Joe cant be too far behind, because after all he deserves something from life and it’s to be dumb just like the celebrities from Hollywood he watches.
So are we getting dumber as every generation unfolds. Possibly yes. After all, from caveman time to now, invention of new things has to eventually slow down, I mean you can only invent a wheel once, and a hammer once too… whats left to do? After all it’s hard to impress someone with writing a nice book, or inventing something because it requires thought, and time… and why invest all that if you can accomplish the same by saying or doing something dumb… either way people will remember you.
So as you may have it, Chimbles is all for it, and gives you the permission to continue being dumb as usual. Go for it America, it’s your turn to shine.
Watch it!….. Do it!
While browsing the net with no goal in particular I have stumbled upon… well upon CHIMBLES.
Sitting somewhere between Random Confessions, and YouTube, sending and receiving packets was a monkey… so I stole him… eat your heart out Curious George, here comes Chimbles The Chimp.
Let me know what you think!
Hey there soldier!
Comments are closed for now… seems like some nasty bug caught on to Chimbles.com and is spamming the comments on here like crazy, thus sending even legit ones into moderation. Moderation is couple hundreds long, and it’s too time consuming to approve the ones from you.
Hold on tight, hopefully this one is just temporary 
(<- This smilie is cheesy)
Take Care,
Chimbles
P.S. Clicky Here if you really want to get in touch with Chimbles
Here’s a clever clip… it’s about laughing… I laugh at people thats about it, and I forgot how to smile as soon as I fell out from my mom, straight into subway tracks (don’t worry I’m ok).
